I have a journal that houses the best tidbits of my childrens' childhoods. All of the sweetest and most hilarious things they've said and done is recorded in there for me to love over at a later date in time. Some of my favorites:
"I'll have a chocolate without steam please." (Aidyn, overheard "ordering" in his room)
"That's my arm knee." (Aidyn, on his elbow)
"I smell like a doughnut!" (Aidyn)
"Ely fell and hurt her brains." (Aidyn, said unconcernedly from one chair while Ely lay screaming beside the other she had just fallen off)
I realize those are all Aidyn's. Ely is just coming into her vocal own and I'm sure soon hers will be overtaking her brothers, but at this point, as I look back through the pages, I'm giggling at Aidyn's unintentional wit.
As I was adding one to the list this afternoon (when Ely unloaded the contents of a couch cushion in her room and then sat in the middle of the giant pile of white fluff so she could play "bubble bath"), I started thinking about the funny things that have come out of my mouth that I should be recording. You know, the things that you just don't get until you're a mom. The things that would stop a passerby on my sidewalk should they waft through an open window. For instance:
"No, we do not put the cat in the dryer! Or the toilet!"
"I swear the next person that says penis is going in timeout for an hour!"
"Do not drink your bathwater! That's like licking a butt!"
"If I say it has germs it does!"
"Just brush it off, you won't even taste the dirt."
"I know you like all the pinecones, but only one gets to go live with us."
"Sometimes we just need to pee outside."
"Because people don't like your feet in their face, that's why."
"We don't talk about boobs in front of other people."
To all you moms who understood that perfectly without having been there, cheers. :)