Random Tidbits of the Heart....

In my daily Internet wanderings, I found a little food for thought....

First of all, for all you married couples, a very simple expounding on a previous post:

Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrong doing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

When I say I love you it means:
* I will be patient with you
* I will be kind to you
* I will not be envious but will rejoice with you
* I will not be arrogant but will be humble
* I will not be rude but will speak and act with kindness
* I will not insist upon having my own way but will seek our mutual happiness
* I will not be irritable or resentful but instead forgiving and good natured.
* I will stand by you.

Three little words: I love you. How do you know I love you, by how I treat you.

Second, and this really is funny and thought provoking all at once, some marriage advice from kids:

HOW DO YOU KNOW WHO YOU SHOULD MARRY?
You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming. -- Alan, age 10

No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with. -- Kristen, age 10

WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?
Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then. -- Camille, age 10

HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?
You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids. -- Derrick, age 8

WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?
Both don't want any more kids. -- Lori, age 8

WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?
Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough. -- Lynnette, age 8

On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that Usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date. -- Martin, age 10

WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?
I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns. -- Craig, age 9

WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?
When they're rich. -- Pam, age 7

The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that. - - Curt, age 7

The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do. - - Howard, age 8

IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?
It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them. -- Anita, age 9

HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?
There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there? -- Kelvin, age 8

HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?
Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a dump truck. - anonymous

(From http://m0smith.freeshell.org/blog-romance/blogger.html)

Love...

Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are.
Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two. ~Captain Corelli's Mandolin

I found this quite by accident this morning and fell in love with it. I love the idea that after the "blossom" of new love, you find the true roots of deep and caring love. I think a vast majority of people who get divorced suffer this very problem, the "falling" out of love. In many ways, love is like a tree. In the spring, it bursts into color, showing off it's splendid blooms. Through the summer it basks in a warm glow, content and rosy. Then the fall comes, and the colors fade. One by one the leaves fall, and then the winter is upon it, cold and fierce, seemingly without end. How sad and all too frequent are those days when it seems harder to be together than apart, when nothing goes right and you think, "This is not what I signed up for.". It would be much easier to give up, the days of warmth and sunshine a mere memory. If one waits, however, and gives the tree the proper nourishment it needs to grow, it will weather the storms of winter, and one day, probably when you least expect it, you will see a tiny bloom of color. I think this is a lesson for all of us. Appearances can be deceiving, make sure to tend the "roots", and the fruit will follow.

Evan...

I could probably babble into infinity about all of the things that drive me crazy and make me melt about Evan, but I'll do my best to do him justice in this shortened timeframe. He's everything that makes me smile and cry at the same time. When we first got married, I read a saying that went, "A successful marraige requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.". Nothing could be more true. Everyday he teaches me something new and beautiful about life and fills it with memories I'll cherish forever. He's the most original person I've ever met. He sings off key at random moments. He is obsessive about his routines. He makes up diddies about the kids' diapers. He'll spend an hour in the toy aisle picking out one matchbox car for Aidyn. The most beautiful thing about him is the way he loves; he's slow to anger and quick to forget, completely loyal without reason, and I've never seen him put his happiness ahead of anyone elses. He's pulled me outside in the middle of the night to kiss me in the first snow of the year. He laughs and gives me a score when I burp. He calls me in the middle of the day to say he loves me. Most of all, he simply puts up with me. He'll hold me while I cry for no reason, listen to my ranting without judgement, and never complains about my odd way of going about things. Evan is the epitome of everything honest and faithful. For these reasons and millions more, I love him - not just because of who he is, but who he has made me.

Is Love Enough?

I used to think that love was enough...now I know better. When we're young we have wildly optimistic and romantic notions about love and life. We're told we can do anything we put our minds to, all you need is love, and when one door closes another opens. I used to believe that...then I had kids. What none of those people tell you is that the door that closes is in reality being slammed in your face by your angry two year old, while the only thing on your mind is how much you'd like to lock said two year old in a closet and fly somewhere tropical. And let me tell you, at that point you realize love is never enough. At some point reality sets in...mortgage payments, mountains of laundry, and three hundred tantrums about no chocolate for breakfast. But then sometimes, in the middle of the daily grind I call my life, my four month old smiles her big gummy smile at me. Sometimes Aidyn takes my hand and pulls me to his room to play cars with him. Sometimes while making dinner, I peek into the living room to watch Evan holding our two little wonders in his arms in a rare moment of calm, seemingly oblivious to the hectic world around them. And at that point I realize, sometimes, love is exactly enough.